10 haikus about office life every entrepreneur can relate to

Hold the awkward elevator! You're late for an echoey conference call. These 10 haikus highlight the best and worst relatable moments of office life.

Working in an office comes with quirky characters, inexplicable rituals and rites of passage everyone takes for granted.

We celebrate the weird and wonderful through a collection of haikus every office worker would understand based on a killer infographic from Saving Spot.

Making tea

Is there anything as inextricably British as brewing a cuppa? But when does the tea run go from being a great excuse to take a break from your desk, to being a ritual some of your lazier colleagues begin to expect?

I offered them tea, like monsters they all said "me", nineteen cups of tea

Returning from vacation

Nothing can dim your post-holiday glow like the first few minutes back at your desk. From a deluge of unread emails to a day full of catch-up meetings, it’ll soon be like you never left!

Tanned glow, relaxed smile, work stress gone until I see five thousand emails.

Accidental “reply all”

An inside joke can take on a life of its own in the digital age as people forward it on indiscriminately; we’ve all been there. In a world where accidentally hitting ‘reply all’ is all too real, remember to double-check the recipients before you click ‘send’.

Shrink in my corner, my boss has seen... Hit "Replied All" to send a meme.

Busted computer

If your temperamental computer rebels against the simplest of tasks, it’s likely you’ll identify with the haiku below. Nothing like Murphy’s Law to cue the spinning cursor of doom just when you’re about to make a big presentation!

Important meeting, crucial files...ten minutes... woe computer won't start.

Conference call woes

Conference calls and video chats have made the world a smaller place, connecting offices and clients across continents with a simple click. What never figures in this rosy picture is the echoey time lag, dropped calls, or forgetting to hit mute when you want to have a side-bar with your colleagues.

Hello, Hey, Hello! Has the conference call stopped or was I kicked out?

Office birthdays

Is there anything more awkward than gathering around your colleague’s desk and singing happy birthday in 12 different keys? No one is immune from this ritual, and it doesn’t take long before you run out of witty things to say in these generic office birthday cards. At least there’s cake!

Sing, laugh, sign, repeat, office birthdays ev'ry week, at least we get cake


The Wi-Fi cuts out

A world without Wi-Fi sounds more like the plot for the next Hollywood horror flick than an office reality. That moment when the Wi-Fi drops usually ends in one of two ways. Either pandemonium breaks out and prompts a mass exodus to the nearest Starbucks for free internet, or everyone takes it as a welcomed break and occupy themselves with busy-work. Sure, those post-its needed rearranging!

No wifi, no calls, no emails, no rules...chaos...wait...thank God it's back.


Coffee break

Coffee break: the underrated break between lunch and quitting time. Some productivity experts insist that regular breaks (coffee optional) is the holy grail for efficiency. Others see it as a distraction, and possible breeding ground for office gossip.

Sleepy, tired, almost Done, but my heart jumped when you said, 'Some coffee hun?'


Monday morning zombie

Every office has morning people and afternoon people. For health and safety reasons, it is best to give these two groups plenty of space from each other.

Do not speak to me on Monday mornings or else I may eat your brains.


Awkward elevator

The architectural design of your building may compel you to spend several minutes at a time in a confined space with people you don’t know well enough to interact with, but have seen around the office so much it’d be rude not to smile. As a coping mechanism in an awkward elevator, some people hold their breath, while others stay glued to their phones.

Elevator full. Hold your breath and stand still, eyes fixed on numbered lights.

Which of these haikus are most relevant to your office life? Share this article before the Wi-Fi cuts out!

Praseeda Nair

Praseeda Nair

Praseeda was Editor for GrowthBusiness.co.uk from 2016 to 2018.

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